Eating cheese. Lots of cheese, as in Cheddar cheese. Yummy. Woke up in the morning, constipated. Not a good way to start off the day.
Jim is having a wonderful conversation with the bathroom mirror.
An Oxford comma walks into a bar. Orders a gin, and tonic.
~@NeinQuarterly (Nein. Eric Jarosinski, editor), 2013 July 30th tweet
If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments. ~Steven Wright