He Didn’t See This Coming

Yesterday morning, Mortimer J. Finkdink III, was taking his morning stroll. He always stops in the local coffee shop, for his daily cup. He always gets a large, as he likes to last throughout his walk. After he left the shop, he ambled on along on one of his favorite streets. A few minutes later, a woman who has never seen before stopped him. He always liked saying hello to all the people he ran across, but was perplexed seeing this well endowed woman.

The following conversation ensued, and what happened shortly there after.

She: Hello.
He: Hello.
She: My name is Barbara ‘Boom Boom’ Sashay.
He: Nice to meet you, Barbara.
He: I’m Mortimer J. Finkdink III
She: I’m new in town.
He: I see.
She: Can I ask you a question?
He: Sure.
She: Before I ask, I must tell you, I have 44DDDs.
He: Okay.
She: So, would you like to see them?
He: Where?
She: Right here.
He: On the sidewalk in public?
She: Yes.
He: You could get arrested for doing that.
She: So. Don’t you like big knockers?
He: Well, in a flustered, stammering way, ah yes I do, maam.
She: What’s the problem then?
He: This is not New York City, where it is legal for women to go bare chested.
She: Pretend we’re in New York.
He: Well, its not.
Then he had an itch on his shin, that he bent down to scratch, and all of a sudden, she lifts her shirt up, and swings her knockers, and caught him the side of the head, the nearly full cup of coffee, goes flying out of his hand. It landed on the windshield of a passing car, which scared the shit out of the driver, and proceeded to slam into the car in front of his, and then got rear ended.

After all was send and done, Barbara ‘Boom Boom’ Sashay, said, “If you only took me up on my offer to view my beauties, this would never had happened.

Eventually, Barbara ‘Boom Boom’ Sashay, got arrested, for being a public nuisance, and got to spend 10 days in the local hoosegow.

As for Mortimer J. Finkdink III, he never saw this coming.

———-
Thought I’d give it a try at writing a short, humorous story. Fiction of course.

It Was 50 Years Ago The Beatles Appeared On The Ed Sullivan Show

It was 50 years ago, (Feb. 9, 1964) when The Beatles appeared and did their thing on the Ed Sullivan Show. I still can remember when they landed in NYC, a day after I had turned 15 years old. And then watching them on a black & white Zenith TV.

The Beatles arrive at John F. Kennedy International Airport, 7 February 1964
The Beatles arrive at John F. Kennedy International Airport, 7 February 1964

Image source: http://wikipedia.org